Phoenix
Member
“Connor, it’s Sam. I need to talk to you about Todd, and I need some help with some research. Can you meet me at the public library at 47 Wabash Street?”
“Okay.”
Sam wasn’t pacing. But she was rocking on her heels and toes as she stood at the bottom of the staircase to the door of the public library. She had called Connor that morning, given him instructions on how to get to the Elliot Carniage library, and told him to meet her there around two. She couldn’t have made it any earlier, as she had to wait for Kyle to show up to take over the front desk.
And it’s breaking me, morphing me, and forcing me to strive,
Yeah, I’m endlessly, hopelessly, dreaming I’m alive.
Although she probably should have said what she had discovered about Todd to Connor before he came, she was nervous. The things Connor had said the first time they had talked, the things he had implied about Todd, hopefully meant he knew about him. Hopefully. She had no idea if he knew, but something in her gut told her he did.
She had her headphones in, The music was the only reason she wasn’t pacing. The new remaster of the Absolution album by Muse had come out, and she was anxiously listening to Hysteria on repeat. The song had always been one of her favorites by them, but the demo version that had been included in the anniversary remaster had really done something to her brain chemistry.
And I want you now, I want you now,
Give me your heart and your soul
‘Cause I want you now, I want you now,
Give me complete control.
She ran her hands through her hair, pushing the choppy curls back from her face. She dragged her fingers through them and brought them up into a ponytail, then fished through her pocket for an elastic. She tied her hair back and swallowed as the song began to repeat, the electronically distorted began to buzz in her ears, at full volume. She moved her head and her shoulders to the music, letting the nervous energy flow into a partial dance.
Everything was going to be fine. She was going to figure this out. Whatever Todd was, she was going to figure it out and she was going to be there for him. She was more determined about this than she had been about anything else in her life. More so than when she was fourteen, taking three martial arts courses a week and kickboxing lessons to prove to her parents how serious she was about becoming a “superhero”. She had done everything they had asked, excelled at everything, and they had given in and presented her with a suit when she was fifteen.
Now, she was turning that determination onto Todd. She was going to research him, she was going to study him, she was going to learn what she could about him, and she was going to use all of that to help her struggling cannibal. Because even with this knowledge, every fiber of her being still said Mine. He was hers no matter what. Even if he killed her and ate her, she would never regret choosing to make him her whole world. Not ever. He had already given her so much more happiness and warmth than she could remember ever having in her life. He deserved her best efforts.
Sam looked down at her phone. It was almost two p.m.. Connor should be arriving any moment. Any moment they would go inside this library and go straight to the mythology section. She was likely going to save the digging into Todd’s life before foster care until the end of their trip. Her laptop had died a few weeks ago, and she hadn’t had a chance to take it in for repairs, so she was going to have to use the library’s computer.